I remember very vivid the news/media people being at the auditorium in Pasadena. My mother was baptized when she was pregnant with me. I am now 37 yrs. and have not been attending this "church" for about 12 years. I cannot begin to tell you the scars I have from WCG and from my mother thinking she was raising me the way God intended mothers to raise their children; to break their will. Thank God I have a very strong will. Nonetheless, I have troubles each and every day, too numerous to list. I want so much to get close to God again and to have him in my life. There were so many positive things that came from "the church" I'm sure that is what keeps me going. I have tried going to other churches and I just don't feel comfortable. I counseled with ministers too. They tell me I have "spiritual abuse." I'm sure of that. I know God can help me through anything.

I want to tell you how much it meant to me to see the web pages on this church--our old church!!! It literally bring tears and goose bumps to me. I think I am bothered by this more than I realize. I know my other three sisters are, but it's something we don't talk about any more. They are continuing to follow my mother (like before) in a nice (?) Christian church. Wish I could do the same. I want to, but something makes me feel uneasy and sick inside.

I have been the black sheep of my family my whole life--although there is no such thing according to my mother. I quit attending after I married a real life David Koresh in the Portland Oregon church. He would read Scriptures to me even if I were in the restroom and scold me for missing church because I was doubled up in menstrual cramps. I divorced him and kind of went on a rebellious binge. I have since woke up and am on my way to recovery and have a wonderful job that God has blessed me with to be able to take care of my children. I am so very grateful! I really am.

I know Jesus as my Savior. He gives me the strength every day to continue. The biggest troubles I think I have is the overwhelming feelings of guilt. Why?? I am always getting after myself for one reason or another. I hate it and I know it can't be a right feeling to have all of the time. I am so very emotional too. Finding this site, brought back floods of feelings I forgot I had. I thought I dealt with everything. "After all that was then, get over it, don't let it ruin your life" as my mother would say.

I never could understand why "we" were so special and the rest of the world were sinners beyond help. Thank God the real "Plain Truth" came out. God bless you, and your efforts to speak the "Plain Truth." I hope you can save a life from the terrible experiences I have endured.

I will continue to study your site. I have been in counseling for other things (WCG seems to be the root of it all), and they just don't understand. I feel confused. Like maybe I should just let it all go. I do feel as if there are things inside me though that I am dealing with unconsciously.

My mother and I are not very close. I honestly think she is dealing with more (hurt; guilt feelings) than any of us kids are.

Is there a support for such people as myself? I am a single mother of  four beautiful children and let me tell you, every day is a struggle. Please help me know that God really is there for us and the horrible fear from my childhood can go away.

By Lina - Child Survivor of WCG
August 27, 2001

An End to Guilt (Excellent message that focuses on the unconditional love of God and gives a clear understanding of grace)

Comforting Words About the True God (true statements that show how God really sees His children)

Articles For Those Who Were Emotionally and Spiritually Abused

Back to Stories and Testimonies From Child Survivors