I left the church in 1996 after all the major changes finally blew the church apart. I have close relatives with (ministers). I guess I'd just had enough. I agreed with many of the doctrinal changes, but I think I had been asking serious questions of myself (and my wife) about the so called exclusivity of the church on Christianity. All the many Scriptures which seemed to contradict doctrines and weakly dealt with came back to mind and today (after trying a couple of other religions) I would find it so difficult to sit down and listen to someone trying to tell me what the truth of the Bible is. I've been there and done that for years and so much of it turned out to be crap.

I can closely identify with Mike about the important thing is my relationship with God and Christ and my faith and seeking first God's Kingdom. I still believe in Christ's return and look forward to that for the sake of the world. In fact if it is deemed by God that I am unworthy of eternal life (which I actually believe I have already been promised) then it is His will that I still want to come to pass regardless if I am included or not. It seems I spent so many years with people whose main motivation seemed to be to save their own skins and lived in fear of loosing them.

I could go on for some time about the manipulation techniques of the church leaders (I'm not sure if they always know what they are doing, neither if they are not sincere) and the naïveté of some of the doctrines, the emphasis on only some Scriptures and ignoring of others, but there already has been much writings on these things.

There is no doubt that I have felt conned and sometimes abused in the church and used choice words under my breathe, or to my wife, about some goings on and people in the church, including the hierarchy. I'm cheesed about all the money I gave 'em so they could live it up, while I struggled with my family, etc. etc. However there are a couple of points I would like to make. Not everything in the church was bad. Some of the hurt caused, while it was wrong, could have been genuine mistakes. Some of the things that happened were similar to things that happen in any organisation where there are people. A company, the police force, army or bowls club. I'm not trying to excuse anybody, and surely there are people who have been hurt, abused and suffered far worse than I, I'm just making the point that this is not exclusive to these churches.

I am sorry I didn't leave many years earlier when I nearly did over treatment from an incompetent self elevated minister, but I would hate to have left and then never attended any church. Yes it's true that I don't attend any church today and I could have learnt the important things and been brought to Christ by God through many other Christian churches, but it would be extremely difficult to learn the love of God having never gone anywhere, and "all works together for the good of those who love God." Today I am at peace knowing that God is in control of my life and that whatever happens will be because he either caused it or allowed it to happen. I suppose we are all different and affected differently by life's experiences, but I feel that sometimes there is a lot more profit in concentrating on the present and the future and thanking God for life's lessons than remaining bogged down in hurt and bitterness.

God knows what happened, God knows the truth, and He allowed things to happen as they did. Relax in his care, and cast all our cares on him, including the baggage of the past. Look to the present and look to the future, I think it's going to be pretty good.

Lots of luv,

By James
February 10, 2003

Articles For Those Who Were Emotionally and Spiritually Abused 

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