I have a story about how I went from "converted" to "unconverted" and back to "converted" again. That's right. And all from the words that proceeded from the mouth of the "true ministers of God."

I was known for many years in the Worldwide Church of God as a "converted," serving, vital member of the body. As years passed it became increasingly more difficult for me to provide for my family due to all the tithes and offerings. Any married male that has had a stint in the WCG should understand. Sometimes I didn't send in my tithes--but I always dropped in my offerings.

A few years later we moved and because of a certain job I  had, I didn't go to church all the time. When Ruth¹ (my wife) counseled with Ken Peterson, the associate pastor at church, he told her, "I don't think he's converted. Just forget about what he's doing. God is working with YOU." She said, "But what about how he changed in thus and thus so shortly after he was baptized?" Mr. Peterson responded, "Well even ALCOHOLICS can change." (She never told me that at the time.)

It got rougher for me to even save up a 2nd tithe, but we managed to scrape the money together to go each fall. Times were rough financially and finally I got a job where it required a little work on Saturdays periodically. I had to do it or lose my job. Only thing was it caused me to miss services a lot of times. (Let me just interject that after about four years in the WCG I always felt like I couldn't measure up. I never was as good as the other members that I thought were doing everything right.)

On Sabbath an elder asked my wife Ruth where I was and when she told him I had been working on the Sabbath, he told her she was to go tell the minister right away. When my minister heard about it, it wasn't long before he set up an appointment to pay me a visit. I knew I would be raked over the coals, but I also knew I had to provide for my family.

After the minister told me all the ins and outs of how the Sabbath should be observed, he asked me if I was now going to be "keep the Sabbath?" I told him I "would try." He asked me a second time and I repeated the same words. Then he told me I couldn't come back to church for THREE months until I decided to OBEY God. I stood there in shock. For several years I knew I had drifted from being 100% obedient to what they said was "God's commandments" and now finally the ax fell.

Ruth talked to the minister again before the three months were up, telling him how hard I was trying. He said, "Is he keeping the Sabbath?" She answered, "Not all the time."  Result? The minister told her to tell me I could come back--but I "WASN'T CONVERTED." I was now in a different class. And my wife was married to one of those "rebellious unconverted mates."

Well, Ruth asked for and obtained 2nd tithe assistance that year. Her "rebellious unconverted" husband didn't have enough saved up. The minister emphasized to her, "He's not to touch one dime of it!" Being made to feel like an unconverted slob and losing the friendship of a deacon in the church, I went to the Feast at least expecting to serve as an usher. The first evening I got there I was told by an elder that I could NOT serve in any capacity because I was "NOT a member of the church." Even my wife was beginning to distance herself from me: "the carnal of the world."

But let me tell you that I decided that feast I would serve in my own way. I went around to the elderly, the handicapped, the poor. I talked to ones that were down and out. I still felt like a BUM around the ministers and elders and many of the members. But that was how I served! They couldn't stop me from that! 

Months went by and I decided to have a talk with my minister on how I'd been trying to get closer to God. We were at a basketball game and I found him and went up to him, expecting to have a good talk. I had prayed a lot beforehand. Result? He told me, "I don't even want to talk to you for a YEAR!" In other words, I was to take one year to work on getting myself converted and to show some fruits that I wanted to obey. I crawled out of there, feeling as low as if I had been run over by a semi, but I vowed I would never go talk to him again.

I went through a lot after that, feeling like I wasn't good enough for God's Kingdom, feeling I would never make it. Every time my wife tried to discuss something with me about "God's commandments" my mind just shifted and became dark and negative. After all, I was the "black sheep of the congregation." At a holy day one time I even had one member place his hand in his pocket when I came up to him and attempted to shake his hand! After all I was no longer "converted."

Five years later we got a new minister and since he was much friendlier I thought maybe I could approach him. It took quite awhile to get my nerve up, but finally a time was set up to counsel. I wanted to present all the evidence I could to show I might be "converted." (By this time Ruth and I thought possibly I was converted because of the way my mind was in those early years.) This new minister and I talked in a room for two to three hours and afterwards he said I "WAS CONVERTED." I thought prayers had been answered! 

But at the very next holy day I learned that a lady member was madder than a hornet because I had been told I was "converted" and had partaken of Passover. She told my wife, "How the HELL could he be converted after everything he did!" It seems that she felt I ought to stay unconverted for all my past sins.

You may think that I became the model member after that. But I still had difficulty seeing how we were to pay all those tithes when God said we were an infidel if we didn't provide for our own family. Tkach Sr. started changing things on down the road and I thought at first he was sincere and all be would okay once he got everything turned to grace. Ruth was the first to uncover that it was a "cult" and Tkach Sr. was lying through his teeth, and so she left before I did. It took me awhile to leave. And here I was, the "rebellious" one to start with! 

But I finally made the break in a moment of anger over an argument with Ruth on whether Tkach was corrupt or a good guy. I actually left the cult for her. I was angry at the WCG for a long time. I couldn't figure out how I could have been so deceived! But it takes a lot of courage and guts to leave and I congratulate any that have done it. 

And let me end this by saying, LOVE in a family is the most important thing, not rules and regulations and commandments and laws, but LOVE!

By Larry
February 10, 2001

Footnote:

¹ Name has been changed

"A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another." ~ John 13: 34-35

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