| Many of you
have expressed how it is almost impossible to get close to God after
exiting. You wish it wasn't
that way, but every time you think about God, something fills you with
dread and despair. You find yourself fearing Him and at the same time
hating the thought that He might come near if you asked.
Many of you know that PCG wasn't "God's true church," and that Gerald Flurry was just another false teacher and false prophet who was interested in power and money. You now know he lied. But have you wondered if what was taught inside the group about this "god" was also lies? (Before proceeding, be sure you have a grasp of mind control and exploitive groups and have read Getting the Group Out of Us.) The "god" you were taught in PCG was not the true God. This "god" had more the traits of an evil being, comparable to Satan, than of the true God of Scripture. Are those words too strong? Then think for a moment about how "God" was presented to you in PCG. The emphasis was always placed on a powerful, judgmental, angry "god" who would punish you (and others) if you didn't obey Him the way Gerald Flurry and his ministers instructed you. This "god" was hard to trust and He would cause bad things to happen to you if you didn't measure up. Fear, dread and anxiety were your constant companions, while at the same time you felt compelled to serve this "god" because, after all, PCG was "God's true church." Or was it? Gerald
Flurry focused on O.T. prophets
and prophecies, and end times and disaster, and
Israel's failings, and how "you better not fail, or you won't make it
into the Kingdom of God." All this striving and performance (with accompanying
fear, shame, confusion and guilt) served to
keep you from thinking. And it served to keep the true Jesus (who was
"God with us") at a distance, almost like the children of Israel
wanted Him kept at a distance when they gathered around Mt. Sinai. This
wrathful "god" that you were taught always seemed so far away, yet
you were made to feel that He was waiting
and watching to punish His creatures for the slightest sin. All
those years your focus was on what you needed to do and how one slip-up
in disobeying this "god" (actually the "government
of God" which was correlated with the leader) would bring a curse, disfellowshipment,
punishment and eternal death. You learned that this "god" didn't let people get
too close to Him. It seems inconceivable that any of us could ever find ourselves enmeshed in a system so evil that the leader's sole purpose was to exploit and betray us and who would use all manner of lies and manipulation in order to accomplish this. PCG is only one of hundreds of religious groups in the world that are successfully deceiving others with similar words and techniques. It has nothing to do with "God." PCG actually kept you from knowing the true God and replaced Him with some kind of satanic "god." Love, mercy, compassion, comfort, grace, forgiveness--especially as God intended it to be revealed through Jesus--were twisted and mingled with hate, anger, screaming, terror, dread, guilt, shame, and depression. Are these good fruits? How can you begin healing spiritually when you have messages inside your mind that are untrue? It's hard to separate God's love and acceptance from what you feel is His anger and displeasure, let alone comprehend how you could ever come to love Him. That false "god" of Gerald Flurry's is so hard to get rid of. But in time it's possible to replace the lies with the truth and to see the true God manifested through the exceeding kindness and love shown through Jesus. You don't have to "study the Bible," or do something, in order to win His favor. The first thing that is needful is to rest, realizing He understands what you've gone through, and that you need time to heal. But for those who want to think further on this subject of the true God, here are some thoughts: Grace was despised in PCG and similar groups. (Read how Herbert Armstrong likewise despised grace and talked about how it was "license to sin.") In fact, nothing was known about the grace that is greater than all our sin; the grace that has a transforming power and is freely bestowed; the grace that can set us free from unfounded fears. Grace and truth came by Jesus Christ. (John 1:17) How do we understand those words? Grace means "unmerited favor." We don't receive it by doing any kind of work or ritual, or by being in a certain church. It's not based on fear. It's based on knowing His promises which will never fail. But you've had much fear placed in your mind. Why? To keep you from leaving PCG; to keep you in bondage. It is this fear and dread that oppressed you. It will take time to sort through all the lies and to understand what has happened and to know it's not your fault. God loved us so much that He came to us in human form to live among us. Jesus was "God with us." (Matthew 1:23) It is only through Jesus that we can ever know what the true God of love is like. Jesus was full of grace and truth (John 1:14). Grace means: "approval, favor, mercy, pardon and privilege." Truth means: "faithful; sincerity in action, character, and utterance." Jesus was merciful, kind, loving, gentle, and compassionate. He went about doing good--healing the sick, encouraging others, and providing for their needs in various ways. Instead of making people afraid, He calmed their fears. Using a concordance, you might want to look up how many times Jesus said, "fear not," or "be not afraid." Even after His resurrection, some of the first words he said to His disciples were "peace be unto you." (Luke 24:36; John 20:19) Everything that we can know of the true God is what has been shown us of Jesus, who brings us face to face with the true God. The Bible reveals that Jesus is known by over 100 different names and titles. (Read some of them on our site.) Only the Lord Jesus Christ, through His Holy Spirit, the Comforter, can open up our minds and begin to show us the truth about the goodness, mercy, forgiveness, and unconditional love and acceptance of God towards us. Through Jesus' death on the cross, God demonstrated once and for all how much He loved us. There is no greater, nor deeper love than this. When we place our faith in Him as our personal Savior, He will at that moment give us eternal life--which can never be taken away--and clothe us with His righteousness. Jesus saves to the uttermost--and that means eternally. It is possible to have a closeness with Him without fear or dread of punishment. He has made us "accepted in the Beloved" (Ephesians 1:6) and we have assurance of salvation (I John 5:13). This is not based on our feelings (which have undergone much manipulation), but on His sure promises. Remember when Jesus was transfigured in His glory with Moses and Elijah (Luke 9:28-31), and how that afterwards Peter wanted to build three tabernacles, one for Jesus, one for Moses and one for Elijah? But what did the voice from heaven say? "This is my beloved son, hear ye him." Then when they looked up, they saw no man, only Jesus. (Matthew 17:8) Instead of focusing on Herbert W. Armstrong, Gerald Flurry, or any man, our eyes need to be turned upon Jesus. Because of the depth of your betrayal by unscrupulous men who would corrupt the Word of God for their own gain, it takes a long time to heal emotionally and spiritually. There is no shortcut in spite of how you would like to trust Him and to find Him faithful. But those of us who have been through this can affirm that He will never leave you, nor forsake you; neither will He stop loving you. He will continue to send you encouragement no matter how weak and depressed you feel. He will comfort you in your sorrow and carry you through. No matter how many questions you have, no matter how much pain, anger and confusion you are experiencing, you can tell Him how you feel and He will always understand. You can make it through. "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light" (Matt. 11:28-29). May you come to know this true
God of love and may you find rest and eternal life in Him.
And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent. ~ John 17:3
From Terror of the
Psalms to a Prayer (written by a child survivor)
Comforting Words About the True God (true statements that show how God really sees His children) Suffering in the WCG (this writing can also apply to one exiting PCG; covers "losing God") How Can I Ever Trust God as Father? (includes letter from child survivor) Common Spiritual Difficulties After a High Demand Group (also links to "Common Emotional Difficulties After a High Demand Group") Poems/Free Verse/Comfort in Music (comfort for survivors of abuse; no audio) My Position in Christ (accepted and secure forever) Comparing the One True Churches (helps to see the similarities between HWA's "one true church" and other groups which claim the same thing) [offsite link]
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